Over at this blog a mother has proudly proclaimed she has given her son an iPhone and it comes with some rules. Doesn’t seem to bad does it. Well the rules are mostly self serving and downright silly. It is a power move so she can maintain control of her son a little while longer. It is a sad, pathetic attempt and any other adult should publicly shame this woman for such deplorable behaviour.
Let us go through them one by one.
1. It is my phone. I bought it. I pay for it. I am loaning it to you. Aren’t I the greatest?
I think number 1 says a lot. But Mostley it says this “gift” is not a gift I still own it. Also give me all your adulation for this non gift. This statement concisely describes her real motivations behind this entire situation, and her general motivations in life (including the decision to have children in the first place).
2. I will always know the password.
Extreme control freakery when a good parent would be starting to give there child space to explore etc.
3. If it rings, answer it. It is a phone. Say hello, use your manners. Do not ever ignore a phone call if the screen reads “Mom” or “Dad”. Not ever.
More control freakery once again this phone is nto a present it is a desperate and misguided mothers attempt to retain control.
4. Hand the phone to one of your parents promptly at 7:30pm every school night & every weekend night at 9:00pm. It will be shut off for the night and turned on again at 7:30am. If you would not make a call to someone’s land line, wherein their parents may answer first, then do not call or text. Listen to those instincts and respect other families like we would like to be respected.
Yet more control freakery nothing wrong with limiting times of use but the constant handing over each day is just a little something to massage the mothers ego. And what’s wrong with calling a frind when there parent might answer first? That’s just weird I called my friends many times and sometimes there parents answerd first. All they ever said was hi Humphrey I will give him a shout for you. Very Strange.
5. It does not go to school with you. Have a conversation with the people you text in person. It’s a life skill. *Half days, field trips and after school activities will require special consideration.
Even this one sensible provision turns into an effort to control her son.
6. If it falls into the toilet, smashes on the ground, or vanishes into thin air, you are responsible for the replacement costs or repairs. Mow a lawn, babysit, stash some birthday money. It will happen, you should be prepared.
That’s just coldhearted the mother assumes all control the child assumes the responsibility, actually that is good metephore for life but it doesn’t make it right. Also I don’t think it is actually possible for a child to earn enough through babysitting pocket money etc. to replace an iPhone.
7. Do not use this technology to lie, fool, or deceive another human being. Do not involve yourself in conversations that are hurtful to others. Be a good friend first or stay the hell out of the crossfire.
I childish thought from a childish parent who wants there child to be “well rounded” yet they cant even said bad things about bad people.
8. Do not text, email, or say anything through this device you would not say in person.
Really? whilst I don’t know the child a blanket ban like this is very silly what if they are extremely shy there are many people who have started experienced and enjoyed meaningful relationships because it was easier to text than say what you wanted to say.
9. Do not text, email, or say anything to someone that you would not say out loud with their parents in the room. Censor yourself.
Self censorship pretty much guarantees this kid will have emotional issues later in life.
10. No porn. Search the web for information you would openly share with me. If you have a question about anything, ask a person – preferably me or your father.
If this was really an issue they would not be providing there son with unfettered internet access just another means of control
11. Turn it off, silence it, put it away in public. Especially in a restaurant, at the movies, or while speaking with another human being. You are not a rude person; do not allow the iPhone to change that.
But how can I answer your possive and melodramatic calls like imn ment to if its actually turned off.
12. Do not send or receive pictures of your private parts or anyone else’s private parts. Don’t laugh. Someday you will be tempted to do this despite your high intelligence. It is risky and could ruin your teenage/college/adult life. It is always a bad idea. Cyberspace is vast and more powerful than you. And it is hard to make anything of this magnitude disappear – including a bad reputation.
This is just plain stupid apart from a few freaks with no idea of boundries who sends out pictures of there genitals? I think this one says aloth about the mind of the mother.
13. Don’t take a zillion pictures and videos. There is no need to document everything. Live your experiences. They will be stored in your memory for eternity.
This is just odd yes most pictures and videos are rubbish but taken loads of thenm increases the amount of good ones that you actually want to keep.
14. Leave your phone home sometimes and feel safe and secure in that decision. It is not alive or an extension of you. Learn to live without it. Be bigger and more powerful than FOMO – fear of missing out.
Classic Overbearing controlling parent admonishing there child for something they have not yet done. Let him at least make a mistake first before you tell him off. Otherwise it makes you look like you enjoy telling him off and that’s not healthy.
15. Download music that is new or classic or different than the millions of your peers that listen to the same exact stuff. Your generation has access to music like never before in history. Take advantage of that gift. Expand your horizons.
Instructing your child on what to like and not like is uber control freakery. I might be misreading this but it also sounds like an instruction to break the law and pirate music.
16. Play a game with words or puzzles or brain teasers every now and then.
This just seems odd and pointless most games are games with words puzzles and brain teasers.
17. Keep your eyes up. See the world happening around you. Stare out a window. Listen to the birds. Take a walk. Talk to a stranger. Wonder without googling.
HAHAHAHAHAHA whatever happened to stranger danger. Also wonder without googling yes denying you child access to one of the most important sources of knowledge is good parenting how?
18. You will mess up. I will take away your phone. We will sit down and talk about it. We will start over again. You & I, we are always learning. I am on your team. We are in this together.
Control and emotional torture, nice!
It is my hope that you can agree to these terms. Most of the lessons listed here do not just apply to the iPhone, but to life. You are growing up in a fast and ever changing world. It is exciting and enticing. Keep it simple every chance you get. Trust your powerful mind and giant heart above any machine. I love you. I hope you enjoy your awesome new iPhone. Merry Christmas!
xoxoxo
Mom
In number 1 she states that the phone is her property then, in 6 she obligates another individual to pay for damages etc. Another valuable life lesson, people will try and get you to sign unfair and contradictory contracts
He should reject the contract and phone since she said that he would eventually lose/break it and that he would pay. He should just bite the bullet and just do all that babysitting working etc now and cut out the middleman or woman in this case and have the phone as his own property. Also when it becomes time for him to take care of her in her old age he should bring all sorts of contracts for her care. etc.
The real lesson from this is it doesn’t matter how much you want something it’s often not worth what is being asked for it, and if a gift comes with rules and provisions it’s not a gift.
Dear parents. This sort of thinking scars people for life. You may think its guidance and nurturing it’s not, you are a massively controlling parent whose love is conditional and is desperate for the adulation of her Child. That is merely how you justify it to yourself.
Let us go through them one by one.
1. It is my phone. I bought it. I pay for it. I am loaning it to you. Aren’t I the greatest?
I think number 1 says a lot. But Mostley it says this “gift” is not a gift I still own it. Also give me all your adulation for this non gift. This statement concisely describes her real motivations behind this entire situation, and her general motivations in life (including the decision to have children in the first place).
2. I will always know the password.
Extreme control freakery when a good parent would be starting to give there child space to explore etc.
3. If it rings, answer it. It is a phone. Say hello, use your manners. Do not ever ignore a phone call if the screen reads “Mom” or “Dad”. Not ever.
More control freakery once again this phone is nto a present it is a desperate and misguided mothers attempt to retain control.
4. Hand the phone to one of your parents promptly at 7:30pm every school night & every weekend night at 9:00pm. It will be shut off for the night and turned on again at 7:30am. If you would not make a call to someone’s land line, wherein their parents may answer first, then do not call or text. Listen to those instincts and respect other families like we would like to be respected.
Yet more control freakery nothing wrong with limiting times of use but the constant handing over each day is just a little something to massage the mothers ego. And what’s wrong with calling a frind when there parent might answer first? That’s just weird I called my friends many times and sometimes there parents answerd first. All they ever said was hi Humphrey I will give him a shout for you. Very Strange.
5. It does not go to school with you. Have a conversation with the people you text in person. It’s a life skill. *Half days, field trips and after school activities will require special consideration.
Even this one sensible provision turns into an effort to control her son.
6. If it falls into the toilet, smashes on the ground, or vanishes into thin air, you are responsible for the replacement costs or repairs. Mow a lawn, babysit, stash some birthday money. It will happen, you should be prepared.
That’s just coldhearted the mother assumes all control the child assumes the responsibility, actually that is good metephore for life but it doesn’t make it right. Also I don’t think it is actually possible for a child to earn enough through babysitting pocket money etc. to replace an iPhone.
7. Do not use this technology to lie, fool, or deceive another human being. Do not involve yourself in conversations that are hurtful to others. Be a good friend first or stay the hell out of the crossfire.
I childish thought from a childish parent who wants there child to be “well rounded” yet they cant even said bad things about bad people.
8. Do not text, email, or say anything through this device you would not say in person.
Really? whilst I don’t know the child a blanket ban like this is very silly what if they are extremely shy there are many people who have started experienced and enjoyed meaningful relationships because it was easier to text than say what you wanted to say.
9. Do not text, email, or say anything to someone that you would not say out loud with their parents in the room. Censor yourself.
Self censorship pretty much guarantees this kid will have emotional issues later in life.
10. No porn. Search the web for information you would openly share with me. If you have a question about anything, ask a person – preferably me or your father.
If this was really an issue they would not be providing there son with unfettered internet access just another means of control
11. Turn it off, silence it, put it away in public. Especially in a restaurant, at the movies, or while speaking with another human being. You are not a rude person; do not allow the iPhone to change that.
But how can I answer your possive and melodramatic calls like imn ment to if its actually turned off.
12. Do not send or receive pictures of your private parts or anyone else’s private parts. Don’t laugh. Someday you will be tempted to do this despite your high intelligence. It is risky and could ruin your teenage/college/adult life. It is always a bad idea. Cyberspace is vast and more powerful than you. And it is hard to make anything of this magnitude disappear – including a bad reputation.
This is just plain stupid apart from a few freaks with no idea of boundries who sends out pictures of there genitals? I think this one says aloth about the mind of the mother.
13. Don’t take a zillion pictures and videos. There is no need to document everything. Live your experiences. They will be stored in your memory for eternity.
This is just odd yes most pictures and videos are rubbish but taken loads of thenm increases the amount of good ones that you actually want to keep.
14. Leave your phone home sometimes and feel safe and secure in that decision. It is not alive or an extension of you. Learn to live without it. Be bigger and more powerful than FOMO – fear of missing out.
Classic Overbearing controlling parent admonishing there child for something they have not yet done. Let him at least make a mistake first before you tell him off. Otherwise it makes you look like you enjoy telling him off and that’s not healthy.
15. Download music that is new or classic or different than the millions of your peers that listen to the same exact stuff. Your generation has access to music like never before in history. Take advantage of that gift. Expand your horizons.
Instructing your child on what to like and not like is uber control freakery. I might be misreading this but it also sounds like an instruction to break the law and pirate music.
16. Play a game with words or puzzles or brain teasers every now and then.
This just seems odd and pointless most games are games with words puzzles and brain teasers.
17. Keep your eyes up. See the world happening around you. Stare out a window. Listen to the birds. Take a walk. Talk to a stranger. Wonder without googling.
HAHAHAHAHAHA whatever happened to stranger danger. Also wonder without googling yes denying you child access to one of the most important sources of knowledge is good parenting how?
18. You will mess up. I will take away your phone. We will sit down and talk about it. We will start over again. You & I, we are always learning. I am on your team. We are in this together.
Control and emotional torture, nice!
It is my hope that you can agree to these terms. Most of the lessons listed here do not just apply to the iPhone, but to life. You are growing up in a fast and ever changing world. It is exciting and enticing. Keep it simple every chance you get. Trust your powerful mind and giant heart above any machine. I love you. I hope you enjoy your awesome new iPhone. Merry Christmas!
xoxoxo
Mom
In number 1 she states that the phone is her property then, in 6 she obligates another individual to pay for damages etc. Another valuable life lesson, people will try and get you to sign unfair and contradictory contracts
He should reject the contract and phone since she said that he would eventually lose/break it and that he would pay. He should just bite the bullet and just do all that babysitting working etc now and cut out the middleman or woman in this case and have the phone as his own property. Also when it becomes time for him to take care of her in her old age he should bring all sorts of contracts for her care. etc.
The real lesson from this is it doesn’t matter how much you want something it’s often not worth what is being asked for it, and if a gift comes with rules and provisions it’s not a gift.
Dear parents. This sort of thinking scars people for life. You may think its guidance and nurturing it’s not, you are a massively controlling parent whose love is conditional and is desperate for the adulation of her Child. That is merely how you justify it to yourself.
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